I'm not gonna find another you..

I dont really have much to rant but I guess that I am back with my bubbly happy joy-ish me.. well literally but I guess theres a piece of an emo me still left on the inside. I hope that this will last and I just dont want to feel so fucked up with realities like how I felt last week. It sucks that I cant even do anything and the feeling is freakingly helpless.. I guess karaoke really works for me, you know. Hehe

I guess all I have to do is to move on.. forget about my suck-ish result and do better for the next upcoming tests and trial. I just want to do my best but I guess the prayer part went missing and that is why I am always the almost-person.. You know the person who is almost having an okay results, a person who is almost happy&content and a person who is almost better and so on. I guess I have been missing in action did alot of things without even remembering all the need of motivation for my spiritual self.. I was being so selfish that I almost forgot about God and Religion. I feel so bad that I took this for granted, I will only pray when I need somethin and hoping for things to go right.. and my solat wasnt as perfect as how it used to last time. I am not a good person but I am trying to be better now..

Talking about my least favourite subject.. BM!! I am trying to love you.. No matter how tough for me to understand this subject, i'll try to solve you okay. No more hate for you, its only goin to be about love.. although I yawn like gazilion times when it comes to you.

My days went pretty okay today. Too bad that I feel so sad, I skipped General Studies paper one and two classes for forum practice. I feel bad and its not the norm for me skipped class.. so i guess its a priceless waste, like seriously.But its okay that I am actually with my chicas and LOL-ing in bilik kebudayaan, killing time composing new scripts for pertandingan in tawau. Talkin bout tawau, I CANT WAIT!!! Hehehe! :D I am hoping for another better day tomorrow.. and another better day and episode of him again. He made my day! Hehehehehe :)))))

BTW I guess this is the only time that I feel like typing this long so be thankful for my mood now. I just want to thank FARRAH NASSER for telling me something.. its like something you should tell me last time. I am so so so so over him fyi like laaaaaaaaaama suda if you didnt know that cause he is like so so my past. Macam episode 0.5 but season 1.. sekarang ni season 11 suda cerita hidupku.. Nampak betapa kejauhannya dengan perkataan 'move on' ku sekarang? wakakaka :P and yep I still find him disgusting like hell but when you tell me about it, it makes me feel so fucking ew like hell! Gali aku ni mcm desperate. wakakaka! btw It doesnt change anything and he is still a mistake, triple mistake! Hahaha. I cant belive how stupid and ew I was last time that I actually fall for someone like that. OMG GILA OH, mana la aku simpan otak aku time tu ah bhe??? hahahahhahaha! But but thats my past and I am not that easy now, you know that ;) kan? :P

I guess I am ending this long post..

I constantly look at you from far but I turned away when I caught you looking back at me.. But most of all, i love it when I sense that yr throwing those gazilion glimpses brutally to me cause yr waiting for me to say something before you actually leave. I secretly love it when you and yr eyes smile to me, and when you start talking to me.. I will always remember our little awkward conversation.. and those memories of you last time.. and those silly little things that made me curve a tiny smirk on my face. Knowing that you are leaving makes me think that I should actually move on. Probably I'm gonna sing my way away from blue.. but I'm not gonna find another you..